From Chaos to Calm: How to use Routine in Dementia Care

The Journey of Dementia Care

Hello there, dear readers! It’s Larea, and I’m here to guide you on a journey through the world of dementia caregiving. If you’re caring for a loved one with dementia, you’re not alone. I’ve been there, too, and today, I want to talk to you about something incredibly powerful: the magic of routine and dementia.

Understanding Dementia: A Complex Challenge

Dementia is like a puzzle with missing pieces. It can affect memory, thinking, and behavior, making everyday life a daunting maze. Your loved one might forget names, faces, and even how to perform simple tasks. That’s where you come in, as their caregiver, to provide love and support.

Storytime: Allow me to share a story that illustrates the challenges of dementia. Imagine your loved one, like my dear Aunt Faye, once a vibrant soul. We could talk for hours. Her smile could chase away any worries, and her stories were a treasure trove of wisdom.

But as dementia crept into her life, those smiles became rarer, and the stories started to fade away. She would sometimes forget my name, and it was as if pieces of her beautiful tapestry were slowly unraveling. It was heartbreaking to witness, but that’s where our journey with dementia began.

The Role of Caregivers: Unsung Heroes

Let me take a moment to salute all the caregivers out there. You are the unsung heroes of this journey. As a caregiver, your love and patience are invaluable. You are the comforting presence your loved one relies on in their uncertain world.

Storytime: I remember the first time I had to step in and help as a caregiver. Aunt Faye was struggling to remember even the simplest things. One day, she couldn’t remember if she had taken her pills, and her frustration was palpable. When I checked her weekly pill keeper, I found duplicate pills in the same sections. We both realized she was no longer able to manage her own medication anymore. I could see the fear in her eyes. The simplest things had become too difficult for her to process.

As her caregiver, I realized that it was up to me to be her anchor, her guide. It wasn’t just about helping her manage her pills; it was about helping her find comfort and security in a world that was slowly slipping away.

The Challenge of Change: The Dementia Dilemma

Dementia often makes change difficult for your loved one. Even small alterations to their environment or routine can cause distress. Picture this: your loved one might wake up and not recognize their surroundings, causing anxiety and confusion.

Storytime: Changes can be especially tough for someone with dementia. I remember when we had to move Aunt Faye and my mom from their home into a new senior apartment building. The move was necessary to help simplify my mom’s life as a caregiver and provide her with more socialization. The two sisters had lived together for many years and my mom was her full-time caregiver. 

It seemed like a simple transition to us, but for Faye, it was a seismic shift.

She became agitated and disoriented, desperately searching for the familiar. It was a stark reminder that routine and familiarity are lifelines for those with dementia.

The Benefits of Routine with dementia: A Ray of Hope

Now, let’s dive into the heart of our discussion: routine. In the unpredictable world of dementia, a daily routine is like a lifeline. It provides structure, comfort, and familiarity. Think of it as a reassuring rhythm in your loved one’s life.

Storytime: I saw the transformation that routine brought to Aunt Faye’s life. We established a simple morning routine that involved toileting, her favorite cup of coffee, a recliner, and the old shows channel on TV. It became her daily morning ritual.

This routine didn’t just bring predictability to her mornings; it brought a piece of her old self back. The smile that had been fading began to return, and the fear in her eyes lessened. Routine was the bridge connecting her to the past.

Creating a Dementia-Friendly Routine: The How-To

The journey to creating a dementia-friendly routine starts here. Remember, every person is unique, so your routine should be tailored to your loved one’s needs. Here are some steps to get you started:

1. Morning Matters: Start the day with a calming morning routine. A warm cup of tea, gentle music, or a favorite picture can set a peaceful tone.
2. Mealtime Magic: Stick to regular meal schedules and provide familiar, nutritious foods your loved one enjoys.
3. Activity Hour: Engage in activities your loved one loves, such as reading, art, chores, puzzles, or simple exercises. This keeps their mind and body active.
4. Nap Time: Scheduled naps can help reduce restlessness and provide necessary rest.
5. Evening Calm: Wind down with a quiet evening routine, such as listening to soothing music or watching a familiar TV show.

Storytime: Aunt Faye’s daily routine evolved with time. We included activities that she loved, like listening to her favorite songs and reminiscing about the past. It brought her joy and comfort, and it became a source of connection for us.

She struggled to express herself with words, but her routine allowed her to communicate her feelings and emotions in other ways. That’s the magic of a personalized routine – it’s a language of love that transcends dementia.

Addressing Challenges: When Routines Go Awry

Life has a way of throwing surprises our way, even in dementia care. Sometimes, routines can be disrupted. Your loved one might get agitated, or a sudden event may cause chaos. Here’s what you can do:

• Stay calm and reassuring.
• Redirect their focus gently.
• Offer comfort through touch or soothing words.

Storytime: One day, Aunt Faye’s routine was disrupted by a power outage at her apartment building. The lights went out, and it created confusion in her. She became very agitated.

In those moments, I sat with Aunt Faye and reminisced about the old days when we worked at the hospital together. It wasn’t part of her routine, but it was a familiar and comforting story. Slowly, the anxiety in the room began to melt away. It was a reminder that even in chaos, we could find a way to maintain a sense of routine and comfort.

Emotional Support for Caregivers: Don’t Forget Yourself

Caring for a loved one with dementia can be emotionally taxing. Remember to take care of yourself, too. You are the lifeline for your loved one, and you need to stay strong. 

There have been caregiver moments when I felt overwhelmed like I was running on empty. 

That’s when I realized the power of caregiver support groups, where we could share our experiences, challenges, and triumphs. That is what led me to create my Facebook support group.

I highly recommend you join support groups, like my Facebook Caregiver Support Group, and remember that you’re not alone.

Outgoing Links:

1. Join My Facebook Caregiver Support Group
2. Subscribe to My Newsletter

Conclusion: The Power of Routine in Dementia Care

In this journey through the world of dementia caregiving, we’ve uncovered a profound truth: routine is a beacon of hope. It’s the reassuring melody that guides your loved one through the labyrinth of dementia. It’s the embrace that provides comfort when the world seems uncertain.

Throughout this blog, I’ve shared personal stories of Aunt Faye and the challenges we faced together. It’s a reminder that you’re not alone in this journey, and there’s strength in the caregiving community.

Remember, routine is not just a schedule; it’s a language of love, a bridge to the past, and a source of connection. It’s a lifeline for your loved one, and it empowers you to be their anchor in a turbulent sea.

So, embrace the magic of routine in your dementia caregiving journey. Create a daily rhythm that brings comfort and stability to your loved one’s life. Be their hero, their guide, and their unsung caregiver. Together, we can make this journey more manageable and meaningful.

Until next time, stay strong, stay patient, and keep caring. 💜

The Dementia Caregiver Blog Library

Activities, Advanced Directives, Agitation, Apathy, Approach, Apps for Caregivers, Basic Caregiving, Bathing, Bathroom Safety, Caregiver Burnout, Caregiver Compassion, Caregiver Emotions,  Caregiver Help, Caregiver Loneliness, Caregiver Support, Cold & Flu Season,   Communication Challenges, Dehydration, Dementia Complications, Dementia Doctors, Dementia Safety Home,  Dementia Types, Dementia-Friendly, Dressing Issues, Driving Safety, Eating Problems, Fall Prevention, Family Help, Finances,  Guns & Dementia, Harm Prevention, Healthcare, Help at Home, Hiding Dementia, Holidays, Hospice, Hospital Stay, In-Between Stage, Kitchen Safety, Laughter, Legal Healthcare, Marijuana use, Medication Tips, Music, Nutrition, Pain, Patience, Poop Problems, Relationships, Reminiscing, Routine, Safety, Sense of Purpose, Shadowing, Sleep Issues, Stages of Dementia, Sundowning, Television, Time Travel, Traveling,  Toileting, Wandering

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